Can you go to jail for not paying your child support?
A father espoused his views on child support laws in the United States. I found his statement to be insightful and revealing in regards to the constant madness surrounding child support laws in this country. I believe he accurately advanced the plight of the
American Father in the following statement:
Well Ms. Child support that is a sad tale but the only the ONLY thing unusual about it is that you (the victim) are a woman. As a man whose ex-wife did everything she could do to get me fired then sued me for contempt for not paying alimony, child support, her legal fees, etc. I can say that for men this is common. You see the states have a vested, pecuniary interest in maximizing child support awards. The nonsense that this is “FOR THE CHILDREN!!!” is a lie plain and simple. States make money by awarding as much as possible and mom (sorry Dad in your case) ALWAYS supports the most egregious amounts possible because hey… IT’S HER MONEY RIGHT?!?
Of course if the question really being asked is what is best for the children and the courts answer is ALWAYS that its MONEY MONEY MONEY MONEY then the obvious solution is to always grant sole custody to the party that makes the most. That would completely negate any reason for child support but we can’t do that because 99% of the time its Dad that makes more and as mentioned it isn’t really about what’s best for the children but what is best for generating cash for the state. You see if mom doesn’t work and dad makes $100,000 well then according to the shares model that is a serious stream of moolah heading to the state from matching federal funds. It doesn’t matter if mom is a drug addict, or a psychopath, or pimps out the daughter to her boyfriends in exchange for crack, that doesn’t matter. What matters is maximizing child support and getting the father into arrears as quickly as possible (arrears generate interest and penalties! For the children!!!).
The entire scheme of child support has the effect of paying mom handsomely to divorce dad – then we claim we’re concerned for broken homes. It is designed from the ground up to destroy fatherhood, create conflict (sometimes murder), and maximize the taxation of men. Sorry as a woman you are effected by this as its a fact that most of the time the punishment for past due c.s. is almost never enforced if the guilty party is female. It is often said that the only way to stop child support and alimony is to make women actually have to pay it. Well here’s hoping you see that it is wrong now that you have a taste of what millions of ex-fathers have to endure every single day. We are forced out, told under threat of violent arrest not to see our children, then we are punished for “abandoning” our children with huge payouts to the kidnappers and their agents. When the end of our civilization comes (hopefully quickly) I expect history will view us in the same light we view every other trader of slaves in history.
Here’s the comment that inspired the above:
Ok, I have been reading all this stuff on this site and let me tell you from first hand experience how this works. I went to jail last August while I was in a high risk pregnancy w/ my new baby boy. I was there for 30 days and it was soo horrible. I could not have ANY contact w/ my now 4 yr old son and that doesnt even speak for the 2 I am in trouble for not paying on.
Let me make something very clear. I was married to ex hubby for 5 yrs…during which time, I witnessed him hit my now 14yr old son w/ a remote in the head, call both my 14 and my 10 yr old names such as dumbarse…polite wording of course and asking if they were stupid several times, (which btw they are not by any means)….after I witnessed him spank the 14 yr old which was almost 7 at time w/ a paddle and leave his butt an ENTIRE bruise…i made my decision. I got a job and held it for nearly a year and when i thought the time was right I packed my stuff and the kids and left. Little did I know that I would soon get pregnant w/ my now 4 yr old and was fired almost immediately afterwards.Well to make this part of the story short…he won custody cause i lost my apartment, my car, no job and no money…where as he had it all.
The other day I had to go back for a review and there had been a 4 mth period which i had no money to pay towards the child support this time. but the last 3 mths i have made all my payments as i had had them taken out of my checks. which btw i had to show proof cause they were saying i hadnt paid except for 1 mth. well now they have admitted that out of the original $7000 i owed for back support, i have paid $5000 of it…but yet in less than one mth i have to come up w/ another $2000 or go to jail for 6mths…despite the fact that i am working and paying now, and despite the fact that i am also raising 2 younger kids on my own w/ little pay. This is not about the kids…this is about them getting there share of the money. We have given the government way too much authority…We need to stop this madness. Did I mention that while I am in jail not only will they not be recieving my payments, but they will actually be increasing which will make it that much harder to catch up on.
I am desperate!!! Please give me an idea on what to do…and before anyone says it…i love my kids (all of them) and i am in there lives…at least as much as there “dad” allows it. The sad thing is that there dad actually put me on supervised visits while i was in jail due to who the other 2 kids dad is…nothing to do w/ me myself and i havent seen them but 2 times in the last year. Please believe me…this isnt by my choice. I just want the country to see what we are facing. I would never do this to anyone…especially when there are other kids involved.
1) Child support shouldn’t exist in the first place. Or at least the government/court system should have no say in it. Government mandated child support is just one more nail in the coffin destroying our families.
2) If a man and woman are not married, and the woman gets pregnant, the man should have no legal rights to the child – nor should the female expect anything from him. That is, there should be no legal requests on either party – the government should stay out of it. The male (and female) disregarded any moral (and legal) obligation by having sex outside of marriage or by in the very least, not marrying when they discovered the pregnancy. By attempting to remove the consequences of immoral behavior (financial and social hardship) – you encourage more immoral behavior. By removing the lawyers, judges, legislation, and our matriarchal dominated court system – you force men and women to face these problems without the aid or force of any legal body – and that is a good thing for the child. Both parents would have to negotiate and agree to the terms – without being able to use the force of a court or legal body.
3) Child support is often, if not a majority of the time, used to drive a further wedge between the father and his ambiguous relationship with the child. Women often use child support and judges to intimidate, if not outright harass a man.
4) Our present system of matriarchal dominated family court – has nearly destroyed our culture, our country, and our security. For the last 40 years women have been in control of America’s lawyers and judges. The lawyers all work together because more divorce works in their favor because of the monetary benefit they receive from such legal proceedings.
In America it is almost insanity for a man to consider marriage – or sex for that matter – because of the heinous aggression and contempt that our legal system has in store for him. If you think that all of the following items have been good for America – then please explain to me how:
1) Women pursuing careers (or dreams or whatever).
2) America’s court system rewarding women for divorce and punishing men for having married in the first place.
3) Media bombardment from all angles showing that a woman should have it all – or at least a life free from children, the ‘bondage’ of marriage, and the demands of those pesky men.
4) Medicaid paying for the poor to have children out of wedlock.
5) The tax system rewarding the poor for having a medicaid baby.
If you think that this female dominated culture that has become America is a good thing, then once again – I ask you how? One thing is for certain, that is, a society which promotes such ‘values’ as I mention above, will not stand. It cannot stand. And if you think that America (whatever America is these days) will survive it – think again.
Stories told by child support victims:Joe parta:
Why would states believe that noncustodial parents are an endless money supply? The system causes people to commit crimes or even suicide. I miss lady liberty.
Millanie peters:
AMERICAN LAWS ARE STUPID AND IS COSTING ALL TAX PAYERS AND WASTING TO MUCH OF OUR MONEY ON THINGS THAT DON’T WORK !
Dominique Dawkins:American child support system is a scam and the judges are deadbeat bench warmers who don’t have a clue as to how many good fathers their are out there. If the woman leaves the relationship she should bare all the expense of raising the kids or give them to the father who can most likely give them a better home and a good life.
American child support system is evil and needs to be shot dead and be destroy and put the judges that abused every father in prison and let them rot in their own curupted poison.
Kieth Stoneberger:have now found myself in the boat as most NCP. Before, I used to keep up my payments no problem and I never could figure out why noone else could. I made sure that was the first payment out of my paycheck. I was in an automobile accident in 1998 and was out of work for 8 months and I did not want the support to be lowered because I thought my daughters really needed it. I had enough saved up that I could do that. From time to time, I have tried to get shared custody because I wanted the children. I thought it was pointless anyway to finance my ex wife to sit on her butt. She worked for about 8 months, just before the divorce was final till the accident. She only did that because the her lawyer told her that more than likely she would lose custody if the divorce decree went before him and she did not have a job. So she has to show she was able to make a home with work. Fortunally, our divorce decree incorporated an agreement. Eventually I married again to a woman who brought in 5 kids. Her ex husband has never paid a lick of child support. So I ended up supporting two families. My ex had remarried also and has two more children by him. She had me in court and had my support raised because her and her husband were having trouble making ends meet. I was astonished when she told the court that her husband was not working and was having difficulty finding work and his kids were sufferring. Without question as to my situation, the support was raised. I objected that it is not up to me to take care of his kids also and if she cannot take care of my children with what she gets now, then I ask for custody. I was denied and I was to take care of my own first. Fast foward a few years and the injuries I recieved from the accident had finally caught up with me. I lost me job in 2008 because I need a total hip replacement. Until August of 2010, my support has been kept up. In March 2011, I was in jail for 7 days because I do not have a job to pay the support. I had proof that I been “pounding the pavement” since 2008 looking for work. My injuries are severe enough that I qualify for for rehab services. The court did not wanna see it. My wife and my mom came up with the money. Now my mom is more in debt because of this and I still owe her. This Tues, I am looking at the same thing. I even have the job searches. I am still using the rehab services to get a career change. But it is right, it is only about the money.
Robert Walsh:
I am currently going through the very same incident that the gentleman wrote about above ….. child support and the rules that come along with it….. allow a quick explanation that i am currently experiencing ….. divorced 15 yrs ago …. i agreed to having my kids every other weekend, and 2 days a week…… paying 200 per week for child support…. so for years i paid the child support and shared the children, and for the most part it worked out fine, i of course had to work on saturdays to make enough money to pay my bills as well as the child support, which takes time away from the kids …. I coached my daughters team, and my sons team, took them camping , day trips, bike rides, a cruise, shared as much free time as i could with them…. well, one day i told the kids wouldnt it be nice if you guys could stay with dad for the summers and mom could have you every other weekend and twice a week, i of course wouldnt pay child support during those 2 months, and the kids loved the idea, the idea would have created a closer bond with my children, and i would feel what it feels like to have my kids all the time like mom gets to feel…. well, let me tell you, her answer to that idea was a flat out ” NO ” and if i wanted that badly enough i was to take her back to court….. meaning she was going to fight it ! ….. everything changed from that day on…. i have always paid my child support, and played by the book….. and she wanted me to take her back to court and fight…. more than likely bring the kids to court….. the following week the kids were all upset, and said that mom is really mad and that the idea was not a good idea after all….. this crushed me ! ….. and i immediatly stopped paying child support, and started spending that money directly on the kids instead of sending it to the mom…. then all of a sudden the economy tanked, and i wasnt making any money… all of a sudden i was really behind on child support….. but my attitude was screw her ! … well she took me to court, got a lawyer and twice sent out a warrent for my arrest !! …. my anger towards her flourished, and the wedge began between my children and myself … today my kids dont want anything to do with me… i am the bad guy now ! and she is the hero,….. what i have learned is the system is corrupt…. child support should be illiminated is right ! …. but the time with the children should be split even time each week…… no money involved at all !! This should be a law !! Now i know there are exceptions to this idea, but for most of us , we can make this work between the ex, the kids, and so on…. for the exs who were married to abusers, well then you would have a different rule… but for the majority of the normal divorces this idea would work… and will never split up a dad and his children !! May this not ever happen to another dad again …. it already has happened to far to many.
Jeniffer Wallace:
As a minister, an ordained minister, I want to give a big hand clap to those of you who realize the sanctity of marriage. I too disagree with the idea of child support for a woman who willingly bears a child out of wed lock. This is not just an abomination in Christian society, but in the Buddist, Jewish, Muslim…… No up standing religious organization on the planet supports this. There is always the argument that a man “should not have gotten her pregnant”. As a woman, you set the standard and should not allow yourself to be impregnated! Afterall, the national average cost for a marriage liscense is $ 25.00. Child birth is life threatening. If you are stupid enough to risk you life in child birth for a man that does not think you are worth trhe $25.00 investment to marry you and cover that baby (spiritually) with the privelege of marriage, then you deserve to suffer. You deserve to be penniless and the detriment of that baby should rest on your shoulders alone. After all, if you and I went and test drove a Porche…… and I deceided that I wanted it……. the dealership would not allow me to have it, and then make you pay for it…..just because you are the one who could afford it….. and you took the test drive with me! They would consider that you did not apply for the car! They would take into account that I cannot afford the car! This is the same difference with child support. If you the woman are making a decision with your body that your wallet cannot support, you should not be allowed to keep posession of the child. The child should be given to the father, and if he does not want it, to the state. After all, when the state takes children from the mother, she is not asked to pay child support to the Foster parents! I think that if you are allowed choices, then men, where there was no privelege of marriage, should be allowed to walk away. Bastard children are not on the same level as covenant children. If you don’t agree, read Genesis 21 and 22. Abraham had a bastard child named Ishmael. His presensce began to cause problems in the marriage. God told Abraham not to be saddened about the bondage woman (Haggar the baby mama) and his Seed (Ishmael) but instead to drop them off in the desert and he would take care of them.! He later commends Abraham for his willingness to sacrifice his ONLY son Isaac on the mountain. what is the difference between Ishmael and Isaac? They were both sons of Abraham. Still God did not refer to Ishmael as a Son but as a seed! God must uphold the order that he himself instituted. If he gave the same status to Ishmael that he gave Isaac, he would then spit on the institution of marriage himself. Membership has its privaleges. In short, the ineterest of children hasno bearing on the sanctity of marriage. What God put together let o man put assunder. Placing this obligation on an act of abomination puts marriage assunder. And the women who take part in this are cursed. Statistics show that they are less likely to marry, and the free money child support they recieve is not landing them on Wall street!
Strange huh!
I say there should be NO child support forced upon a father of out-of -wed lock children. This will teach women to have standards and protect the interest of their children.
If you were a husband, then you better stick with those children and find a way to keep the family together.
Mathew franklyn:
I fully understand, and want you to know you are not alone. I don’t have any advice for you other than to do whatever you can to keep your sanity, move forward any way possible, and stay capable of being in the lives of your children, even if it will be years in the future. They are worth it, as I have learned, but the system empowers women to destroy the man, his relationship with his children, or both. You will be left with a choice of which will be destroyed, and no one can judge you if you let the relationship fall, as you will suffer immeasurably if you do not, as I have, but whatever you do, don’t let both die. Also, expect no help as a single father if you are by some miracle blessed with the custody of your children, the system does not value you, you have to do it yourself, unlike all single mothers the system falls over backwards to help. You are not alone.
Bob Timberman:
I would like to comment as a man that has had his life and that of his children ruined by an evil woman empowered by a system hellbent on destruction of anything good. My ex was allowed to move in criminals, drug addicts and whatever slug she could find, while my life was under scrutiny even for having my kids in the company of my then girlfriend. I fought and went bankrupt twice trying to get the court to hear me. It was the arrearage from an unfair system that was the concern of the court. Even though child support and visitation was supposed to be two separate issues, the stature before a judge of a man fallen behind on support is that of a deadbeat. The system is evil and because no moral judgment is made, the system should be shut down. The government should not be in the business of administering child support. In any given county in America, there is the largest building in the county seat and that building holds the child support agency. Many resources are expended in a heartless endeavor that does destroy the lives of the children.
No morality = evil. The courts are evil entities. I am in agreement that folks having children out of wedlock should be ashamed (even though I know that I have done it – I know and have learned). The court system should not be involved in a support role of something with such negative affects on society. The courts should prosecute crime and not the fathers of children. No, it is not fair that a man lays down and gets a gal pregnant, but it is not fair that a woman lays down and gets pregnant. Money will not make the situation any better but it will help pay the bills. A system that enslaves the man and empowers the woman will not make the life of the child any better.
I have been a non-custodial parent and paid and I have been a custodial parent (single parent) and have received nothing. It was not worth it to me to see the woman anymore and she disappeared. She would have only been ordered to pay $5 a week and I did not want her around. The court really does make everything worse. I think government can only mess up anything it touches because of the lack of morality of the State.
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